Let me first say, I never thought I would be a pastors’ wife. Growing up, sure I went to church, but I didn’t know anything about having a relationship with God. As I look back on my life, I now see how God more than once covered me, graced me, and gave me the wisdom to leave the old me behind. With this in mind, I have at times arm wrestled with not feeling like I was “good” enough for this role. Like my past automatically kept me from being able to be an “elegant and proper” pastor’s wife that so many women portray. I have now realized that some women want to portray themselves this way because they are not comfortable with who they are or what their past is. I will not pretend I didn’t have a crazy past. Think of all the women I would not be able to connect with if I kept it to myself. When we don’t accept who we are, and where we have been, we abandon the chance to relate to people.
What if Mary would have ran from God and chose not to accept her place as the mother of our savior? She couldn’t have been any less “qualified” in the world’s eyes; poor, 13 years old, and a virgin! And she was chosen to raise the man that would save all of humanity. I am just imagining her coming to the realization of what she was responsible for, she so easily could have said , “Peace, I am out of here,” never talked to Joseph again, and given the baby away. This is why I really would have connected with Mary; she didn’t give a lick what people said! She put on her big girl panties and did what she knew she had to do whether or not she thought she was deserving of the job.
Freedom Center’s launch service is less than three days away and although part of me is freaking out the other part is filled with excitement because I can’t even begin to imagine all of the great things God is going to do! With a testimony like mine there is no doubt in my mind that he wants to use it to show others just how big he is and only he could have turned my life around.
To all of you amazing church planting wives out there, how has God used your crazy past (if there was one) to bring other women to Christ?